Toilet paper should go which way? Carl and I debate

On our recent World Cup 2014 adventure to Brazil, Carl Tyler and myself had daily car debates we recorded. Here is the one on toilet paper direction.

See our Worldcup blog for more photos and videos via the Flickr group and YouTube channel.
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    On Friday, September 19th, 2014   by Chris Miller        

Watch Warren Elsmore get electrocuted at IBM Connect 2014

While editing the Great Geek Challenge video from IBM Connect 2014 I came across a clip that was too good not to share.  Yes, the LEGO master himself, Warren Elsmore, gets a jolt during a game.
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    On Monday, April 7th, 2014   by Chris Miller        

When ’Reply to All’ goes all wrong

Someone sent a blanket email for dedicated server pricing to a list of 175 vendors.  Unfortunately they were all in the To field.  It seems even IT sales people can't understand Reply versus Reply to All
Image:When ’Reply to All’ goes all wrong
I particularly like the one I highlighted in red.  Keep in mind I couldn't even get them all on the page.  

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    On Friday, September 27th, 2013   by Chris Miller        

Angry Birds and Pigs peace treaty goes awry (video NSFW)

I ran across this Angry Birds Peace Treaty YouTube video, redone in English, for all of you Angry Birds fans.  Maybe we need one of these meetings at Lotusphere.
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    On Tuesday, November 23rd, 2010   by Chris Miller        

Lotus just confirmed, calendaring broke at the end of 2009

As I stared at a clock I was given at a past Lotusphere, shown below, I noticed something strange.  The date was right but the day of the week was wrong.  I glanced higher to see the year showed '90.  I thought the battery died.  No.  I went in to settings and changed the year.  It went form 1990 to 2009 and then flipped back to '90.  While this clock does tell multiple timezones and temperature, making it a nice desk edition, I would think any digital clock would go farther than 19 years total when I didn't even get it until late 90's for sure.  Damn Lotus calendaring.

Image:Lotus just confirmed, calendaring broke at the end of 2009
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    On Wednesday, February 3rd, 2010   by Chris Miller        

Mac vs PC, the rap video (well produced parody)

They did a great job on the above video (link) covering all the quirks between what users expect.  Even with some good background singing .  Props to Julian for finding it!
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    On Tuesday, December 29th, 2009   by Chris Miller        

IBM Master Inventor has his house Twitter from automation software

I ran across this by accident (another blog post) and it is an interview with Andy Stanford-Clark, IBM Master Inventor.  A huge position but humorously he took his home automation software, based on MQ Series, and has it Twitter.
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    On Thursday, September 25th, 2008   by Chris Miller        

Proof that someone listens in my presentations

Hi Chris
I just wanted to show you that at least we learnt something in all the view's   ;-)

This "chris'ed" mailtemplate of my collegue

Image:Proof that someone listens in my presentations

Best Regards

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    On Monday, July 14th, 2008   by Chris Miller        

"Web 2.0 Goes to Work" meets previous "Work the Web" from Lotus

IBM announced this week (as seen in many places including CollaborationMatters) a page dedicated to "Web 2.0 Goes to Work" using the web as a delivery platform.  So I went back in the local machine archives and came up with this gem.

Image:"Web 2.0 Goes to Work" meets previous "Work the Web" from Lotus

Funny how it takes the new Web 2.0 mindset to move your internal stuff to the Internet to interact with customers more
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    On Friday, June 13th, 2008   by Chris Miller        

International Notes Hater day? Someone has humor

Apparently May 13th is the day, they (NotesHater) are even selling merchandise for it.

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    On Monday, April 7th, 2008   by Chris Miller        

Sametime oddity

Might just be my mind playing tricks on me, but all my IBM contacts in my Sametime buddy list show 7.5.1 when many of them used to show 8.0.  Call me crazy but that is bizarre with the beta of 8.0.1 floating around that they showed at Lotusphere with Sametime 8 embedded in it.
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    On Tuesday, January 29th, 2008   by Chris Miller        

Well the kids already have Sametime, who not this..

One part of me really doesn't want to know this much all the time.  The new age parent says this is a great ideas.  See the image..

Image:Well the kids already have Sametime, who not this..

Seems to me the old idea of be home by dark is gone.
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    On Monday, January 7th, 2008   by Chris Miller        

Comments overheard at recent seminar/conferences - taken out of context

So we started collecting comments at conferences/seminars said by both presenters and attendees.  I then forgot to post them until I added a few more in Chicago.  So while I prep for Admin 2007 Europe, read and enjoy.  While these are actual quotes, if we take them out of the context of the conversation, then it changes the whole meaning....
  • They stuck lit cotton balls in my ears and up my nose.  It was the best haircut I have ever had.
  • As long as it's only that thumb
  • Squeeze that in my mouth and throw berries at me
  • No, I went commando that night
  • You can't eat these fireballs
  • It's like putting suncream in your mouth

And the granddaddy winner of them all..
  • I don't like anything on my butt, only in it.

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    On Tuesday, November 27th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Some spam mail I got today targeting IBM partners..

I found this interesting and quite amusing for some reason:

I'd like to introduce our company, Repharm Technologies, to you. We are a knowledge base company, and we sell contact lists. We have a variety of lists available, from hardware, software, to technology companies, with on average 10 executive contacts per organization.

I see from your website that you are an Alliance Partner of IBM and wondered if you'd be interested in acquiring a copy of their customer list?

While I put no merit in this, they make some huge assumptions with an even funnier company name.  Repharm?  As in reputation harm?
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    On Thursday, November 15th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Tired of people "owing you a beer" and never paying up? A new service keeps track

I found this site (called Foamee) quite funny.  It requires a Twitter account, but that is it.  From there it even has a widget to show who you owe and who owes you a beer. Good to have for Lotusphere right?

Image:Tired of people "owing you a beer" and never paying up?  A new service keeps track
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    On Tuesday, November 13th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

The new Hipster PDA - it does Notes too

You can find it right here..
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    On Friday, September 14th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Before the restaurant and dining recap, one picture of tonight

Image:Before the restaurant and dining recap, one picture of tonight

The final set is right here on Flickr
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    On Saturday, July 21st, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Caption contest - Scene from Collab U in London yesterday

Image:Caption contest - Scene from Collab U in London yesterday
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    On Wednesday, July 18th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Carl finds the Sametime 7.5.1 Easter Egg. We were playing around today and kudos to him

Go peek right here
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    On Wednesday, June 13th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

New Sametime 7.5.1 feature? The server answers your chats when testing? (screenshot)

Image:New Sametime 7.5.1 feature?  The server answers your chats when testing? (screenshot)
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    On Wednesday, June 13th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

A map of social networking software

I modified this from the following site, but it gets the idea right across for the time being..
You can zoom in in IE.  Just click the icon below...

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    On Thursday, May 3rd, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Ever wonder about the cycle of a blog posting?

I found this article here that had an easy to understand diagram of how everyone interacts with a log posting that spurs comments from the readers:

Image:Ever wonder about the cycle of a blog posting?
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    On Friday, April 13th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Apparently there is a new thing called the Internet

Well at least an old news story that hit YouTube thinks so...
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    On Monday, February 26th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

It is announced, a new DST standard and Lotus capability

Due to the number of issues and mishaps with patching operating systems, Domino servers, Blackberry servers and devices and other random calendaring questions, I have decided to first issue a new DST standard and then tell you about the new Lotus feature.

1 - Central Standard Time (CST) and any other area that has to embark on all these changes will now commence using IST (IBM Standard Time) which requires Microsoft to tell you what time your calendar appointments and all other information will take place.  No matter what time the view might happen to show in your calendar view, when you open the entry it will be an hour in some random direction.  If you so happen to then synchronize these entries with a Blackberry, you will be so far off in arrival you are destined to pay fees for missing appointments at your doctor and dentist office.  IST will require you to run countless patches and scripts on your servers and some Java device that makes you drink more coffee since even if you upgrade you servers to the recent version and then run the JTZU, it will still show files not properly updated.  Furthermore, IST is only observed on every 2rd Sunday of the 4th month of the 3rd quarter on oddly dated even years.  IST will require a 487 MB download for the Passport Advantage or Partnerworld site which will be down for IST patching until Apr 1 2007.

2 - Lotus now announces a new part of the Lotus Domino product line (Andy P had a huge hand in this), the Approximate Freetime lookup.  Instead of knowing exactly when a room, co-worker or Sametime on-line meeting will be available, you receive a range of time depending on if they updated their local PC at home, their Blackberry device or have switched to marking stripes on the wall with kindergarten sidewalk chalk.  You are now welcome to casually stroll into meeting rooms at any given time and claim ownership of the room for that time.  The person with the fastest pocket calendar shall win and the other group will get the room approximately when you are done.  In case of a draw, there shall be 3 rounds of rock-paper-scissors with the winner taking control of the room.  This new product will be available for download with the new Lotus software project named "Almost, Close, Estimate"
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    On Friday, February 16th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Can’t make your screen capture size right?

A short YouTube video to show how to get screen captures just right

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    On Wednesday, February 14th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

The MS Exchange meeting on functonality in the UI

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    On Friday, February 2nd, 2007   by Chris Miller        

A parody on the "I am a Mac, I am a PC" commercials

You can find the 4 videos right here.  But here is one of them..

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    On Friday, February 2nd, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Fri fun in the office, pics to see

Pictures were sent over from Troy here in the office.  I am guessing going on any type of vacation is a mistake.

Image:Fri fun in the office, pics to see

You can see the 9 picture set right here
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    On Friday, January 5th, 2007   by Chris Miller        

Availabot... standing at attention when your buddies come online

Apparently Carl talked about this months ago, I just read about it, :-)

A company in the UK has taken presence notification to a new level through
Availabot.  Instead of getting a pop-up, sound or notice that your AOL/iChat buddy has come online, you have a puppet that stands up from a connected USB port.  You need as many ports as buddies you want to stand at attention.
Availabot plugs into your computer USB, stands to attention when your chat buddy comes online, and falls down when they go away.  It's a presence-aware, peripheral-vision USB toy

Apparently you can preload them with your data and even have them customized to look like yourself.  Interesting concept for handing out at conferences
Availabot stores the IM details of the friend it represents in the puppet itself.  That means that you can buy a few, load them with your own IM screen name and service, and give them out like business cards to your closest contacts.

It seems to be ready for Mac with Windows on the way.  Could you see the overzealous CIO with a room of 1000 of these to see how many employees are online in Sametime working with a Sametime Gateweay hooked up?  I found they even have a
youTube video of it working.  Now that theory I just had really gets some humor.
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    On Tuesday, January 2nd, 2007   by Chris Miller        

This was a humorous Lotus Notes posting I ran across

Read the link here, a Friday afternoon game for Lotus Notes
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    On Friday, October 6th, 2006   by Chris Miller        

A sturdy U3 USB drive, Titanium anyone run over by a Honda?

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    On Monday, August 7th, 2006   by Chris Miller        

Paying a quick homage to Steve C again

Steve jumped in today to fix something I had been asking for.  Literally 8 seconds for him then replication.  Missing hair for me.  Thanks Steve (I hear they shave you entirely when you join IBM, be careful)
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    On Wednesday, April 5th, 2006   by Chris Miller        

Does IE 7 solve all your problems?

This video marketing seems to think so.  Quite funny actually.  From YouTube
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    On Tuesday, March 28th, 2006   by Chris Miller        

SMTP connection settings humor from one of my readers

Who would think a simple semi-colon in the wrong place would affect the ability to accept connections from everywhere?  One would image there could be some error checking on those fields so a stray keystroke would not interrupt everything.

So I propose a listing of all fields to get some error checking done.  I didn't say I was putting the entire list together, but it needs to be done.
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    On Friday, March 24th, 2006   by Chris Miller        

Vowe caught my last posting, let me clarify some

He made quite a good joke about it here, but I forgot I have the Lotus client itself with the title as shown on the error since V4 days.  So when I pasted the error it caught my main client title, not any database.
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    On Thursday, February 9th, 2006   by Chris Miller        

Enter technology, exit brain

As we enter the plane today the lady that is to sit two rows up is on her cell phone.  While I was impressed she was using a headset, as many of you should if you do not, her brain left as she chatted away.  Since the flight was on a small ERJ (AA 5354), there is only 1 side of overhead and the other side has a single row of seats.  Nice if you can get exit row on the single seat side (see location in my posting).  However, she was a couple rows in front of exit, which has entirely nothing to do with this story.

As she chatted away, she placed her small bag on the seat and cell phone.  She then proceeded to place her larger bag in the overhead opposite her.  (one point good for her not using all the overhead).  As people filed in behind her, she immediately stepped into the row below the overhead (one point for good airplane etiquette) to let them by.

Please return to top where I state she placed purse and phone on seat.  Thereby leaving a single, thin, black cord stretched across the aisle.  Since most business travelers have bags, coats and lost their brains too, they walked through it like a jungle trap ready to spring.  Here is the steps in your mental mind:

1.        Woman runs trip cord across aisle.  One side secured to her head, one side to small object on opposite seat.
2.        Man with lost brain comes down path oblivious
3.        Man finds trip-wire with mid thigh
4.        Man stumbles on pulling wire
5.        Woman has headset ripped from ear
6.        Phone commences to flying in reaction to pure physics
7.        Physics ends both ear wrenching, man stumbling and phone flying

Final tally?  One slung phone (damage unknown), one hurt ear (damage unknown and brain had left already), one pissed man (mental damage unknown since brain had left)

...... and one hysterically laughing person in 11A (wait that is me)

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    On Wednesday, December 14th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Ed just gave me some grief..

Because he managed to register the hotel on Plazes even after arriving long behind myself and Novak.  We just didn't want to pay the hotel prices (20 Euro for a day) when we had free access at the conference.

I will get you back, no worries :-)
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    On Monday, December 5th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Lotus announcement in response to Microsoft 64 bit hits the presses

Just announced on the tech newswire:

Lotus will only run on Windows 3.1 or 95 for Hannover.  Everyone downgrade!!!  Lotus pushes ploy to overtake Microsoft for good in the collaboration space by absorbing all old Windows installations since no one upgrades fast for desktops.

Sametime to be called One-at-a-time for single threaded processing and Quickplace reverts to Take-your-time place as none of the old operating systems can hold that much memory to begin with

Workplace won't exist as who can work in those conditions?

(yes this is a joke)
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    On Tuesday, November 15th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

An interesting and wonderful talk with another blogger this morning

I happened to get a ping from Ben Rose this morning to my surprise.  What started as a brief hello turned into a conversation on home audio systems, server connectivity, port tunneling and deciding what music to play in what room of your home at what time.  Worse yet, it bounced from topic to topic and interwove them numerous times.

The point is that even though there is approximately 6753.396344791372 kilometers, or  4196.3659384142675 miles or even 3646.5423028031164 nautical miles from each other, it is amazing what people have in common.  This blog thing might just take off yet in the world

P.S.  I have to thank the Western Conference Research Lab of the USDA for the link that does all that conversion with Latitude and Longitude and distance between.  You can find the link under my tools
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    On Monday, October 31st, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Forget online games to waste time, these are better

First of all get yourself out of the office, then spend some time doing something constructive
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    On Thursday, September 15th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

"More than likely" error?

Reading the Domino 7 Release Notes today while preparing some slide outlines for an upcoming presentation.  The following line I caught made us laugh.  A lot.
.....will not work correctly; it will, more than likely, decline the.....

How and when does Notes decide to not work right?  Is there some computation hidden the decides when it works and does not work?  If you were mean to the server will it decide that is the time?
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    On Monday, August 8th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

As I do love my iPod and FM Modulator, this was too funny

I ran across this iPod advertisement and had to laugh.  It is all too true about the accessories they make now.
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    On Tuesday, July 26th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

This should sum it up what I told Tom Duff

Image:This should sum it up what I told Tom Duff

In response to
this posting (since he is in good spirits now I can make fun)
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    On Thursday, July 14th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

The final tally of the survey last week

Last week I posted a mini blog survey based on an Internet one I came across.  Thanks for all the input and answers via comments and email.  Here are the stats from the results.  This was not a huge sampling as Radicati would normally have you believe.  This was small and from many geeks.
1.        So as for our survey, how many accounts do you maintain?

The lowest was 2 with the highest 10.  The mean was 5 different accounts.
2.        How much time do you think you spend reading?

The lowest was one hour amazingly. The highest was 3 hours.  The mean was 1.8 hours per day.
3.        Do you check when getting out of bed?

I laughed at this one since some said in bed, out of bed, and one jokingly said even while sleeping.  I did like the Blackberry answer since that person has it set to come on at 7am.  Amazingly every single person said yes but me.  I try to wait until I get to the office unless I am on the road.
4.        How many times a day do you check ALL the mailfiles?  Not just automated checks of some like we can in Domino

This one was tough to give a mean since more than 4 people put that they check it non-stop during the day.  So let's go with knowing one person did say they checked one of their 5 average accounts only once per day.
5.        Can you go an entire vacation without checking?

Need I say more than 94% of you do check during vacation?  I was one of the few that refuse to do so.

Additional questions
1.        Does RSS save you any time on checking email now?

A full 100% say that RSS saves no time in email and actually adds more things to check, even though it gets a little more streamlined by the answers below.
2.        How many times a day do you check the blogs?

Blogs get checked an almost perfect 5 times per day average.
3.        Do you read the blogs while you are on vacation?

This was almost a 50/50 spit.  It was nice to see that although most everyone checks email, you can at least give the blog checking a break.
4.        How many blogs do you maintain (yes some of you have work and personal ones) ?

The mean on this was 1.3.  This says a couple of you split your personal and business life.  But by reading the above stats it all makes sense as you claim there is no vacation or personal life since you check email all day and read blogs half the time.

I am going to go out on a limb and say this was slightly skewed since everyone that reads my blog is a geek in the first place and being connected is just our way.  I would suggest doing what I do once a year for the past 9 years or so now.  I have one week per year.  One week, where I do not check email, voicemail, carrier pigeon or anything else.  I actually pay all my bills online in advance and don't touch the computer that week.  Hard to do?  It was at first.  But now I crave that week by the time it gets within one month of it coming.  Try it, you can do it.
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    On Monday, June 6th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Northwest Airlines to cut out free pretzels?

Now I don't even like the things but this is getting a little silly.
First it was meal service. Then the pillows disappeared. Now Northwest Airlines is taking away the free pretzels on all domestic flights.

It's the latest twist in an intensive cost-cutting effort that has led Detroit Metro Airport's largest carrier to eliminate many amenities passengers had come to expect.

The airline will stop handing out free pretzels to coach-class passengers on June 9, Northwest spokeswoman Jennifer Bagdade said.

Passengers instead can buy a 3-ounce bag of trail mix for $1.

Northwest has already cut out pretzels on flights that offered a $3 snack pack for passengers. The airline has no plans to eliminate free beverages.

Eliminating complimentary pretzels will save Northwest $2 million annually, officials say. The carrier has lost nearly $3.3 billion since 2001.

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    On Friday, May 27th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Planes, Trains and sharing a couch?

I quite imagine that those weren't two pillows now were they?
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    On Sunday, May 22nd, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Tennis elbow, meet Blackberry thumb

I almost fell out of my chair laughing when I read this about Crackberry's
BlackBerry thumb
Orthopedists say they are seeing an increasing number of patients with a condition known as "overuse syndrome" or
BlackBerry thumb. In some patients, the disability has become severe. The American Society of Hand Therapists issued a consumer alert in January saying that handheld electronics are causing an increasing amount of carpal tunnel syndrome and tendonitis. With that warning, the society included directions on how to properly hold the devices, urging users to take breaks and, if possible, place pillows in their laps so their wrists are in a more upright position.

I would love to see an executive bring a pillow to rest in his lap for his Blackberry that he cannot seem to put down for 20 minutes of meeting time.

Anyone else get distracted by this?  We have no cellphone policies in some of our meetings.  You either leave them at your desk, turn them off or get fired.  Our meetings are short, productive and everyone pays attention.

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    On Friday, April 29th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

A quick IQ test for those of you with freetime

Here are the rules of the game...

To start, click on blue circle.

The IQ test rules are:

1. Only 2 persons on the raft at a time
2. The father can not stay with any of the daughters without their mother's presence
3. The mother can not stay with any of the sons without their father's presence
4. The thief (striped shirt) can not stay with any family member if the Policeman is not there
5. Only the Father, the Mother and the Policeman know how to operate the raft
6. To move the people click on them.
7. To move the raft click on the pole on the opposite side of the river.

and here is the URL

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    On Tuesday, April 19th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Per the rules of Google bombing

duffbert ....   Java .....  phallic
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    On Tuesday, January 25th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

A definition

I attended a call this morning to prep the speakers for Lotusphere and basically overview some items about branding, naming and other assorted items. (list to follow in next post today)  I know I missed some of them as I went into conference call zone.
Conference Call Zone - (n.) First discovered in late 1980's by executives and sales people that spent enormous amounts of time on speakerphone or headset.  Later found to be enticing way to never have to visit a customer.  Technical geeks soon acquired this skill and further enhanced with such tools as webcameras, audio over the Internet and Instant Messaging.

Once said person enters the zone, the mind of the participant shall wander aimlessly through the desert known as the inner self.  At which time, said person shall reflect on things with no meaning.  For example, how many paper clips attached together does it take to go from my office door to my desk?  Is that an official measurement?  Can this old cup of coffee on my desk really grow a small fuzzy animal from it over time?  How many times can I spin the stress balls without dropping them?  Do I really remember whose business card this is?  How did a piece of granola get stuck between the J and K keys on my keyboard (heck, I don't ever remember even liking granola).  Wow, this little toy laser light from the conference really does burn my eyes looking into it.

The only know remedy for entering the zone is a slap from a co-worker to the back of the head, spilling hot liquid on your pants or your head hitting the desk as you nod off, thereby leaving a lump the size of a kiwi fruit for the rest of the day on your forehead.

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    On Tuesday, January 11th, 2005   by Chris Miller        

Happy Holidays to all, back on Monday Dec 27th

Image:Happy Holidays to all, back on Monday Dec 27th
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    On Friday, December 24th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

Since Chris is away...

Since Chris doesn't seem to be around, let's snoop a little...

Hmmm...  over here in another database is his stats file with all his Google hits.  I wonder what people google on to get to his site?  Let's look, shall we?
  • How to do the sleeper hold - Chris must be some anonymous character in the WWE in his spare time
  • Trillian hacks - people really want to find those here!
  • lapdance Reading - apparently Chris *doesn't* have the same taste in books that I do...
  • What time do wasp go to sleep? - That certainly keeps me up at night.
  • noodlebar reading - I have *got* to compare reading notes with Chris at Lotusphere this year...
  • do wasps sleep? - I'm seeing a trend here...
  • reading for pleasure not good - Kill the heretic!
  • Eddie Brill - aw...  how cute!
  • fun things to do while remotely connected to someones computer - I have a feeling I'll find out about these when Chris gets back.
  • pizza with fungus - eeuuwww...
  • pick Tom Duff - how'd I end up in here?
  • pleasure your wife - OK...  I think we've seen enough here...  move along...  nothing to see...

(note to self:  remember to purge referrer entries before going on vacation...)

(additional note to self:  like it will do any good since Chris hosts my blog and has admin access anyway...)

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    On Sunday, August 29th, 2004   by Duffbert        

Some site searches I can’t help you with dear reader

Now I know this will simply add an entry when doing a site search (not Google as they are different beasts) on my blog but I cannot assist with the following:
  • Interliant
  • Navisite
  • Trillian hacks
  • notes hacking

Interliant and Navisite, kind of one in the same now.  They have their own sites out there.
It seems people are always looking for Trillian Pro hacks to get the code for free.  It is only $25 for an awesome client, I say buy it.
Notes hacking?  Are we serious?
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    On Monday, August 9th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

So I am looking at the local paper and there is Mr Brill

Ok, it was Eddie Brill, the comedian, but from the corner of your eye you always pick up on recognized things.  For a minute there I thought our own Ed was doing standup at the local FunnyBone Comedy Club.  Whew!  I could hear the Microsoft jokes flying already.  Of course, most of the crowd there wouldn't get replication jokes, even after the required 2 drink minimum.
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    On Friday, August 6th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

How to break common sense law #437

As I walked up the street in downtown St Louis, they are building lofts everywhere.  Well some construction workers took it upon themselves to do a little handy work to make their jobs easier.

The location:  Beautiful day in the 80's at lunchtime , strong breeze gusting at times, mostly sunny.  This takes place at the corner of Olive and about 8th Street in downtown St Louis.

The characters: Two construction workers, hardhats on their heads and standing on the sidewalk

The scene:  Two construction workers found a large wasp nest hanging below where they are working on a loft on the second story.  They approach the street with spray in hand.  They take aim noting no one within 10 feet or so on the sidewalk.  The spray strikes the nest (lets recall the wind gusts).  The wind takes the spray immediately the other way all over people.  Of course the wasps are now incredibly mad and swarm out to the sidewalk.  The people 10 feet away are now 3 feet and everyone takes off running.  Construction workers drop the spray can and tear off losing hat also as wasps fly everywhere.

The moral: Common sense law #437 dictates that thou shall not spray can into wind at wasps during daylight, and if this infraction occurs with innocent people nearby, you shall get all the stings on said buttocks
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    On Thursday, August 5th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

For those that travel as much as I do, take heed

I had read about this once before but could not recall where it was.  So last night I ran across another article talking about it.  How many of you can guess what the dirtiest item in a hotel room is?  I know the top 5 from reading the study before.  Keep in mind this is a study, not a survey.  Actual 'professionals' went into hotels and did the work.  So put your best guess up before clicking the link.  Comforter? Floor? Sink?  I am not telling.  Just click here and read.  Let me know if you were right though in comments.
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    On Tuesday, August 3rd, 2004   by Chris Miller        

For the RSS readers, IdoNotes is Ad Free!!

Since Ed went there, I had to be silly.  What a slogan for blog RSS feeds,  "Ad Free and Proud!"  Take that Amazon and Google (or send me a better check)
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    On Wednesday, July 7th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

Anyone care to explain these recent Google’s to my blog?

I rarely look at this list but I was goofing around with templates this weekend and took a look.  Quite surprising, mainly one from yesterday
  • classified nokia mobile phone that can ship to nigeria (I have no idea what I posted about that)
  • prostate pleasure (well now I don't do a pr0n blog for gosh sakes)
  • lapdance in st louis mo (Maybe Ed knows those? LOL)
  • quickplace police (I presume policies but lets think on that theory, theyh might be needed)
  • msn broadness band (didn't know they started one)
That about covers the bizarre ones since the end of April.  I dare not go any further back for fear of laughter
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    On Saturday, May 8th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

Now I know what you are thinking about this image..

Image:Now I know what you are thinking about this image..

This was too good to pass up laying on a friends counter.  Thank goodness for the digital camera.  I know what you are thinking, just how hot is a good hard ball or hard crack?  How long does it take to cool?  How much does it weigh?

For all you gutterbrain people, yes it is a candy thermometer but had me laughing hysterically for some reason.

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    On Wednesday, April 28th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

I thought it was because I was sleepy

Subject: Amazing Stuff

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at an Elingsh uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in
waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht
and lsat ltteer is at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a toatl mses and
can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae we do not raed ervey
lteter by it slef but the wrod as a wlohe.

Were you able to read it?  (thanks Scott, pulled this out of email)

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    On Saturday, February 28th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

Did anyone see my luggage at their airport today?

I left the house with every possible intention of arriving with my luggage in hand.  The great feeling of lugging your bag through the airport after retrieving it from baggage claim and putting it delicately in the trunk of the rental vehicle.  The soft thud of the trunk lid as you seal your multi-day belongings into it's new cavern only a few feet off the ground instead of 29,000 feet.  Then it's happy return to a closet at the hotel where it is once again warm and fondled by prying room cleaners throughout the day.

Well mine went AWOL.  I am not sure when it went, how it got out or if the guard dogs were sleeping.  The search lights were turned on, the alarm whistles were engaged and the bloodhounds let loose at American Airlines.  Well at some point during the day there was much rejoicing, celebration and sightings of alien spaceships (that or low flying airplanes dropping lost luggage) as mine was waiting for me at the hotel after returning from the client site today.

My luggage gave no indication of where it was and refuses to talk no matter what torture has been placed on it this evening.  Bamboo shoots under the wheels, sleep deprivation, nothing has worked in telling me of how it escaped to prevent it from occurring in the future.  Hmmm, I might have to ground it and take his smaller brothers where I can cram them into overhead compartments and keep an eye on them myself.  I must run, it is time for a snack for myself and more torture for the bag.
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    On Monday, February 16th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

Well here is the guest speaker

To everyone's surprise and happiness Richard Jeni was the guest comedian that performed.  He walked the fine line, no cursing but great references.  But the line was awfully thin.  I linked to his site.
I also had the pleasure of running into him in the hallway afterwards on the way to my room and we talked for about 20 minutes or more.  He was quite funny and personable which was cool.  I pointed out that he was sitting in front of 5000 or so software geeks and didn't point out that he had a URL???  He found that more than ironic.  But we had a couple laughs and off we went so I could get a nap in before the evening begins.

Image:Well here is the guest speaker
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    On Thursday, January 29th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

went to see Steven Wright last night

For those of you that don't kow him, he is a very monotone comedian with thoughts that totally confuse everything you ever know with bizarre observations.  I think I couldn't breathe for about an hour I was laughing so hard.  He actually gave almost a two hour show at the Hard Rock Live.  Quite the nice venue for any artist, peek at the shots of what it looks like.
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    On Wednesday, January 28th, 2004   by Chris Miller        

is the holiday over yet?

Image:is the holiday over yet?

Oh man I feel like that.

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    On Monday, December 1st, 2003   by Chris Miller        

A new action hero

Send by the hermit worker Chas, the enthralling tale of Moo-pheus.  You can find out all about The Meatrix right here.

Image:A new action hero

The steal the info from Chas..............this Flash animation is the result of a grant
awarded to GRACE, the Global Resource Action Center for the Environment.
The short film has a strong ecology message at the end, but if you can
live with that it's quite entertaining.....

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    On Friday, November 7th, 2003   by Chris Miller